Ah, it’s good to be back. I haven’t posted a good, non-relevant topic up here in forever, so I decided to look through the news and find something to talk about that had no influence on my life whatsoever. It wasn’t hard, it all was pretty worthless. But on to a random statement: I like shoes. I especially like shoes that say they can make you jump like Jordan on a trampoline. So what better $300 pair of shoes can you buy than shoes banned buy the NBA strictly because they can improve your vertical leap to an unfair advantage? Even the big J would kill for a pair of shoes like this.
Wow, I’m bored. Let’s see what else in here. Wow! Taylor Swift just made a song that slammed her ex in the broken face! That is so interesting. And yet not.
Whoa, a map that shows how poverty stricken the USA is with most people only being able to settle with a iPhone 3G. All those poor people who can’t afford an iPhone 4! It’s so heart rending. Those starving Californians.
Anyways, point made. I hate what we’ve decided to call news these days. In the good ole’ times of King Henry VIII, news was to make fun of rulers behind the king’s back, revealing what a jerk he was. Nowadays, all the news is good for is to be reminded that politics is corrupt, and country singers hate their exes… exs… ex’s? Or whatever the plural of ex is.
Why can’t we only have news when there’s something to news about? I don’t want to know if an NFL player got flagged for leapfrogging (literally) someone from his own team, or how many people the Islamic soldiers kill per day, or if Russia is considering… joining the USA… led missile shield. Uh, actually, that last one was okay. Let me check this out.
The missile shield is suppose to protect Europe, and the USA and Russia are going to make it. Why? Oh well, just goes to show that the news, for all its biased stupidity, still has a few good uses. Like letting me know the biased stupidity of everyone else. That’s always fun.
Now, if you will excuse me, I want to see the chances of Russia using this to assassinate some leaders. I wonder if there’s a color chart on Yahoo! News.
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