Anyways… not to change subjects, but I want to change subjects. Looks like Palin is babysitting the “Kate plus 8” kids on a camping trip. Turns out her daughters get along with them really well. Wow, that was boring. I should stick to money.

Okay, so you know how Europe is swimming in a keg of fetid sweat, right? Greece was hit, then some western place had to be bailed out… I forgot the place, but England rules them. And we’re doing less and less economically stable, so… when will it end? I don’t mean the Apocalips… Apocolips… Alpachalypes? However you spell that. I mean this, when is the debt going to get so bad for everyone that we all start passing around an imaginary check and call all even? Unless China is not in debt, then they just rule the world in return for all the debts being canceled. That would be fun for thirty seconds. Why am I bringing this up, you ask? Well, I figure the Chinese will not like stupid TV shows and celebrity guest stars that I get bored with so much. I’m hoping once they get in power, I’ll never have to hear of them again. Also, I doubt the Chinese will have production problems like money and stuff. They always find a way to make a product that is cheap and never ending. I hope they will let us keep the dollar, but hey, if not, I won’t miss old Ben too much.

This is all assuming, of course, that we don’t know what we are doing economically and  that we don’t have a back up plan. I am sure we have precautions for such things as important as selling ourselves to Communist governments. Pretty sure, anyways. A little sure. I hope we do.

I suppose we have to have a few, like doctors, right? I mean, Doctors (notice the capitol D) are the means we have our health. They are the fire that drives our bodies from sickly and informed to well and… oops, did I say informed? Oh well, you get the point. If that point was I don’t like anyone who claims to only want the best for me, then charges me obscenities. And don’t even get me started about the E.R. I’ve been there, and had to pay up. They say no one pays, so I didn’t have to either, but I’m a Christian, so what can I do, ya know? I know one thing, I’m giving myself my own cleansing from now on, if you know what I mean.

Anyways, I don’t see what the big deal is. Generalists have been saving our lives since forever. It’s all the specialists, the elites, and so on that can’t see the big picture. A nose doctor might not see the tumor in your brain. A brain doctor probably will ignore that leak in your heart. A heart doctor will wonder why you have a runny nose. Soon, we won’t even have nose doctors. They will specialize in left and right nostrils. “Sorry, I can’t fix your left blowhole, but I can clean your right. No, your sinus congestion will have to be fixed by Dr. Smartypants. He’s the mucus specialist.”

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think we should get rid of smart people. On the contrary, I want smart people to act the part and be smarter. The body isn’t that segregated, and I have to learn that in college without getting a medical license. As far as what I should do with my money, I’ve got that covered. I’ve got bills to pay, mouths to feed, and… whoa, I thinks that’s from a song. “There ain’t no rest for the wicked, money don’t grow on trees.” I hate that song. So, yeah, whatever, save money, spend money, make money. Don’t get in debt, or you’ll be sorry. Make more than you spend is also good. Budgets, banks, interest, yeah, it’s mostly common sense. Just… don’t be an idiot. Trust me, I’m an expert. Not really.

Is there anything else that experts are good for? I guess they could always form a discussion group. Experts Anonymous, yeah, I’d join that. “Hi, my name is Bob.”

Hello, Bob.

“I am a compulsive advise giver, code name expert, and I have not given advice to people in three weeks.”

Applause, applause.

Never mind, those support groups are boring. I guess that’s why they’re in so many comedy shows. In conclusion, drink Dr. Pepper. Trust me, I’m a doctor.

(Disclaimer: Author is not really a doctor, but drink Dr. Pepper anyways as commercials tell you too, and they are written by expert pitchmen, like Willie Mays, God rest his soul, except he didn’t endorse it.)