Here is the point. Human beings have a natural, though morbid, fascination with death. Why does the government want euthanasia? They want to kill, but they want to do it with a murder label across there face. Stalin had no problem with this label, and sported it in gold lettering on every occasion. That should tell us something. Being fascinated with death is a pass time for people like Stalin and our government, meaning, not for rational, Christian, thinking people. Now, now, I know that every Christian looks forward to that day when we die and are “present with the Lord,” and that’s all well and good, but having a love affair with black, rotting, corpses is wrong. All this to say I hate Tim Burton. Yes, hate.

Now you see where I’m going! I know your first thought was, “I’m not all that into death. What is his problem?” The truth is, you are that into death. Yes you are.

Question 1: Do you think the story in the first paragraph is funny, sick, or sad?

Correct answer: funny and sad… Your answer: sick.

Question 2: Are you angry that I speak of death in such a blunt manner?

Correct answer: You’re weird… Your answer: I don’t like to talk about death.

That’s enough; point made. If you are the one who feels “icky” when talking about the natural process of life called “death,” then you have a morbid fear of death. Not a fear of dieing, a fear of death. The correct view of death is the escape of being fascinated by it, either in fear or admiration. Think of it as what it is, the end of one life and the beginning of another. It’s really just another part of living. Equate a funeral to a wedding. They really are the same thing, except with different ways of expressing emotion.

In conclusion, Don’t worry about death, and don’t look at it with puppy dog eyes. Look at it as a cool thing everybody gets to do once, like getting married, hitting puberty, and loosing your teeth! By far, loosing your teeth seems to be the most unpleasant. And if some weirdo dies in a weird way, don’t hesitate to laugh at the irony. It’s a sign that you’re cultured.